Can you crochet?

Ok so.

I came across this great pattern for a Katamari hat for my unborn child. The problem is that I do not crochet. I thought I had found someone that would make this for me but it turns out that they only knit. I suppose that I could try and learn, but this seems like a pretty advanced project to jump in to.

So I leave it to you interwebs. Who wants to make this hat for me? I will totally buy all the supplies, all I need is someone with skill.

Thank you in advance.